***
I never knew I had the strength to slap someone that hard. People always
said “you can do crazy things when you're mad” never thought they were right. I
couldn't believe the pain that I was in, the anger, the sadness I felt deep
inside of me. I always thought he'd love me forever and never ever hurt me. I
though wrong.
I thought he was strong enough to get away from her. Leaving him behind
and walking towards the door like this really seemed wrong to me. Some part
deep inside of me though he really was telling the truth about him still loving
me but then I shut that side out and started cursing myself for being so
desperate to even have thought of that.
I could hear him calling after me when I reached my car. I'd have to
face him sooner or later but for the time being, I much prefer later. I needed
to get my head straight, get my mind to cope with all of these new changes. I
needed to think what would be my next move…
My mind went numb after a few minutes into driving, I knew I had to stop
of else I’d definitely get into a car accident. I saw a gas station on the side
of the road and pulled over far away where people couldn’t see me cry like a
maniac. The events of the evening kept repeating itself in my head.
“I
know what I did was wrong but I still love her.”
Those words kept repeating in my head like an old record player that’s scratching
the same tune over and over again. I wanted to break it with my bare hands.
I don’t know where he’d find the audacity to say that he still loves her
to me. She’s he’s ex for Christ sake! An ex is an ex because you dumped the
person or the person dumped you! You have to be mad at the person! Not still be
in love with her!
I could just see him getting back with her... The love of my life was
going to slip into the arms of he's former flame. But wait! Why the fuck should
I care? He doesn't love me! He loves that psycho! He never cared for me… He
played me for a fool! Made me fall in love with him just so he could break my
heart into tiny little pieces…
“I
love you…”
No comments:
Post a Comment